Apple is doomed. According to an investment guy who says Apple needs to return more money to the stockholders. In January, it was some guy named Foghorn Einhorn or something like that. My details are a little on the sketchy side. He won a court case. It had something to do with preferred stock. I just went back and re-read what I wrote about it then. You don’t have to.
Apple is doomed. Analysts, stock pickers, tech gurus, bankers, bakers, automotive technicians, and trash collectors all agree that 2013 will be the year Apple introduces the iWatch. They must. They have to. The technology industry is whooshing past Apple in a blaze of glory introducing things that are going to make the eventual iWatch seem silly.
Also, in February, I discovered ancient runes remarking on calculations of Apple stock prices going forward. This is largely based on multiplying by the square root of negative one, and rounding results within the nearest eight significant digits. You have to be trying to get paid for hit pieces in order to apply the formula correctly.
Apple has given no sign of an iWatch, an Apple-branded television, the iCar, and several other gadgets that people who do not innovate for a living define as innovation. Tim Cook has also not become Steve Cook yet, as of March. And, since there was no such thing as innovation before the birth of Steve Jobs, there cannot be any innovation left. Steve Jobs brought innovation into the world, and took it back out with him when he left.
Apple is doomed.
Sequester. In March this was a big word. Also, Harlem Shake.
The iWatch is a total failure. Utter, total failure. I read it in Forbes.
“What iWatch?” You probably wonder.
Another month into 2013, and Tim Cooks is still not Steve Jobs.
Around about April began the announced departure of Darth Fester from Microsoft. As we enter 2014, his replacement is not being announced. I’d take the job if they offered, but they won’t. I’m too old.
In May, I reported that WWDC was coming in June. This appears to have been true. I also don’t appear to have reported on anything else in May. Busy month.
Apple failed to introduce a new earth-shaking doo-dah at the June WWDC.
Jas got her doctorate from the University of Washington and went to work in Texas within days.
Apple is doomed.
This was the month I upgraded my work computer to Windows 7. If you ever (EVER) need a reminder of why Windows is dying, upgrade Windows on a network. Seriously. This is also the month we went to Canada on “vacation.” Canada started with great potential – English culture, French cuisine, and American technology. They ended up with English food, American culture, and French technology. Like Windows running on a Commodore 64.
Analysts guessed Apple’s earnings for the quarter. It was up to Apple to get it right. They didn’t. The stock price changed.
The only thing I noticed of any significance in September is that Microsoft Office products still use an image of a 3.5″ floppy disk as a “save” icon.
Really. It is possible for a person to have a degree in computer science and to have never have used a floppy drive.
I also noticed that several pundits said iOS7 blows monkey nuts. This has been terrible for Apple going forward.
Moto-X all the time, everywhere.
The Apple 5C will be given away on street corners to homeless people. Market share, people. Market share.
Mavericks. Good, modern operating system. Free.
Windows 8. Clunky, fragmented operating system. Price varies with feature set.
Nobody has mentioned in several days that Tin Cook is not Steve Jobs. This is worrisome.
iWatch. Galaxy Gear.
Whatever your guess is on Apple’s coming technology, it has to better than the Gear.
Over Christmas I treated myself to a quintuple bypass operation at the local hospital. Nice folks. I’m living under new rules. We’ll see how that plays out. For the moment, the budget will see some movement in the areas of beer and stogies.