If you saunter over to the top of a MacDailyNews flamewar you can see a link to a video in which you will find out that, with proper punctuation and capitalization, my headline tonight is two lies. Greg Krakow thinks. The iPhone 3G stinks. See?

Some other folks have reviewed it rather positively. Mossberg and Pogue have been fairly reliable shills over the years, but they aren’t positive all the time. At least Pogue has been around Apple long enough to actually get it. They said it was good.

Right now, as is, there isn’t anything that does everything iPhone 1.x.x.x does. Those that manage a subset of iPhone functionality don’t do it as well or look as cool doing it. Assuming version 2.x doesn’t break anything that currently works it will, as an absolute minimum, be the best damn cell phone on the planet (still).

iPhone // is supposed to improve some stuff and add other stuff.

Are you ready to rumble?

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The Sprint Instinct sets sales record 

Is it just me, or should a headline with the term “sales record” in it have some kind of numerical support for the claim?

When the sports page announces a broken record, it always compares the new record to the old record. I guess I’ve come to expect that I will at least be able to find the new and the old records, somewhere. The old record isn’t published. The new record isn’t available.

I want to call bullshit, but I’m just not sure.

Am I alone? Have I lost touch?

Is the Kansas City Star so enamored of their local cash cow that they have no vestige of common sense left?

The most important question facing me:

Who gives a shit?

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Apparently the whole big lovers’ quarrel between Apple and Rogers was invented and nurtured by a blogosphere with entirely too much time on its hands.

Apple needs to step up the pace of its news cycle. The Rogers vs. Apple death match is the kind of crap unemployed bloggers invent to amuse themselves when they actually get tired of masturbating. It doesn’t happen often, but it happens.

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The NY Times is reporting that Fake Steve Jobs is hanging up his peyote. Dan Lyons is going to concentrate on being a “serious” journalist for Newsweak. This is good. Now that we can assume he’s always serious, we don’t have to worry that we aren’t “getting” the joke.

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Rhapsody: No news.

Vista: No news.

Dell: No news.

Zune: No news.

Apparently the things that sucked like a software development secretary becoming a marketing vice president yesterday, still suck today.

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When forced to choose between two evils, always choose the one with the most imaginative lies.